Post by Gor/Strauss on Jun 4, 2008 19:42:12 GMT
Want suggestions/criticism!
Wrote this in about 30 minutes (as I'm sure it shows) after listening to a song that particularly got to me for some reason..anyway this was the result.
Sucker punch
He shifted with frustration in his armour...this new stuff needed more padding he thought. It kept digging into his neck whenever he sat down and he was at this moment strapped into the belly of a transport headed to the surface.
Suddenly the transport shook violently; the pilot said something about turbulence over the intercom to them. This was greeted by mutters and shouts, with some soldiers hitting the deck of the tub with their rifle butts. He decided he wanted to know what was going on outside, so he plugged in this little computer that he’d managed to get off one of those strange techpriest guys. Completely illegal he knew...but he’d not been questioned about it yet. Being a comms engineer has its advantages he thought to himself, no one asks if you’ve got a little computer with you regardless of what you’re doing. He managed to patch it into the ships sensors so he could see what was going on outside as the transport had no windows...probably to stop him doing what he was doing right now, but with your eyes.
He flicked on the screen and barely managed to stop himself shouting out in dismay, he moved just enough to prompt one of the other men to ask him something which he waved away dismissively...the screen was far more important. All he could see was the markers of SAM’s in the air and transports dropping like flies left right and centre. He mustn’t cause a panic..no..that wouldn’t help anyone..But sitting here isn’t going to help either.
Crap.
The soldier, realizing the futility of his situation and that he was the only one aware of it, began to sing quietly to himself. He sang a song he had been working on for his wife of 26 years. His comrades liked to hear him sing and he was quickly surrounded by silence as they listened intently. The usual din of the combat drop drifting away in the face of his voice.
The soldier had spent the better part of those 20 years fighting someone somewhere. He thought of all the situations he’d found himself in over the years...trenches, towers, hills and cities. He’d been everywhere and seen almost everything. He’d found himself in scrapes so bad that most of the men here would have been frozen by fear at the time. The only difference between then and now was that he could shoot back. This wasn’t fair.
As he was singing he began to jack in an earphone so he could listen in on the comms between the pilot and the rest of the crew. He heard frenzied chatter while he sang and then heard ‘Ground Lock. Incoming. Brace for impact.’
At this point the soldier removed his earphone, unplugged his computer and looked at the wrist band his beloved had given him last time they met.
He looked to the rest of the men, some were old some were younger than he was when he first went into combat. Tears began to roll down his cheeks as he sang the last words of his work and commended their souls to the Emperor.
Wrote this in about 30 minutes (as I'm sure it shows) after listening to a song that particularly got to me for some reason..anyway this was the result.
Sucker punch
He shifted with frustration in his armour...this new stuff needed more padding he thought. It kept digging into his neck whenever he sat down and he was at this moment strapped into the belly of a transport headed to the surface.
Suddenly the transport shook violently; the pilot said something about turbulence over the intercom to them. This was greeted by mutters and shouts, with some soldiers hitting the deck of the tub with their rifle butts. He decided he wanted to know what was going on outside, so he plugged in this little computer that he’d managed to get off one of those strange techpriest guys. Completely illegal he knew...but he’d not been questioned about it yet. Being a comms engineer has its advantages he thought to himself, no one asks if you’ve got a little computer with you regardless of what you’re doing. He managed to patch it into the ships sensors so he could see what was going on outside as the transport had no windows...probably to stop him doing what he was doing right now, but with your eyes.
He flicked on the screen and barely managed to stop himself shouting out in dismay, he moved just enough to prompt one of the other men to ask him something which he waved away dismissively...the screen was far more important. All he could see was the markers of SAM’s in the air and transports dropping like flies left right and centre. He mustn’t cause a panic..no..that wouldn’t help anyone..But sitting here isn’t going to help either.
Crap.
The soldier, realizing the futility of his situation and that he was the only one aware of it, began to sing quietly to himself. He sang a song he had been working on for his wife of 26 years. His comrades liked to hear him sing and he was quickly surrounded by silence as they listened intently. The usual din of the combat drop drifting away in the face of his voice.
The soldier had spent the better part of those 20 years fighting someone somewhere. He thought of all the situations he’d found himself in over the years...trenches, towers, hills and cities. He’d been everywhere and seen almost everything. He’d found himself in scrapes so bad that most of the men here would have been frozen by fear at the time. The only difference between then and now was that he could shoot back. This wasn’t fair.
As he was singing he began to jack in an earphone so he could listen in on the comms between the pilot and the rest of the crew. He heard frenzied chatter while he sang and then heard ‘Ground Lock. Incoming. Brace for impact.’
At this point the soldier removed his earphone, unplugged his computer and looked at the wrist band his beloved had given him last time they met.
He looked to the rest of the men, some were old some were younger than he was when he first went into combat. Tears began to roll down his cheeks as he sang the last words of his work and commended their souls to the Emperor.
