Post by Gor/Strauss on Jun 5, 2008 13:46:20 GMT
Decided I quite like this writing malarky...same rules apply as for Sucker Punch please gents.
(I'm not responsible for the censoring of the crude languge
)
Boredom
You know it wouldn’t be that bad if there was something actually going on. I mean by the Emperor! I thought war was going to be more active than this! I’ve been stuck in this gral infested trench for 5 Fraging weeks. So far it’s rained for 2 weeks, which flooded the trench, great. Now it’s getting colder, as if this planet couldn’t be worse! They say it should start snowing any day now. Well damn it that’s just not fair. Wish the Emperor would cut us some slack; I don’t fancy being frozen to the spot, no thank you.
At least we’re fed enough. I mean it’s not great, it’s just your everyday IG standard combat trench rations. “Everything the Guardsman needs to fuel his righteous fury” it says. It might give me the energy to shoot, but that ain’t not good if there ain’t nuthin’ to shoot! It tastes like rotten gral meat too....blagh. Water, as you may have guessed, is pretty easy to come by. The Emperor having emptied His Holy Bucket on us for the last 2 weeks....
Morale isn’t too bad. It’s not allowed to be, the Commissar makes sure of that. The man’s insane, but who comes out of the Schola Progenium not insane..He had Jedins whipped for asking when better food was coming! Now don’t tell him I told you, but if we ever have to go over the top and that fragger is in front of me...well...hey may go MIA...’nade launchers are good at that.
The weapons aren’t doing well though. I’ve had to clean this bastard everyday I’ve sat in this trench. I swear I could have this thing cleaned by a Techpriest and it’d still jam the next day. Got enough ammo so I guess I’m sorta happy. I pity the guys with the lasguns though, there hasn’t been daylight here...well ever. Hate nightworlds. Charging the packs takes a generator and since we ran outta fuel 3 days..days..is that right word? Well 72ish hours ago we haven’t been able to charge anything. Hell all of my laspistol batts were taken by the sergeant!
Oh wait hang on, do you hear that? That’s an alarm, we have incoming! Come on come on...faster faster...right, TAKE THAT YOU...DAMN! Fragging gun...get out you bastard nade...put the next one in..right side down...right! Lets try that again, EAT THIS MOTHER FRAGGERS! WOO! Did you see that? Blew the guy right off his feet and sprayed him over his mates!
Watch it pal, here’s the Commissar.
Might be my lucky day...
(I'm not responsible for the censoring of the crude languge
)Boredom
You know it wouldn’t be that bad if there was something actually going on. I mean by the Emperor! I thought war was going to be more active than this! I’ve been stuck in this gral infested trench for 5 Fraging weeks. So far it’s rained for 2 weeks, which flooded the trench, great. Now it’s getting colder, as if this planet couldn’t be worse! They say it should start snowing any day now. Well damn it that’s just not fair. Wish the Emperor would cut us some slack; I don’t fancy being frozen to the spot, no thank you.
At least we’re fed enough. I mean it’s not great, it’s just your everyday IG standard combat trench rations. “Everything the Guardsman needs to fuel his righteous fury” it says. It might give me the energy to shoot, but that ain’t not good if there ain’t nuthin’ to shoot! It tastes like rotten gral meat too....blagh. Water, as you may have guessed, is pretty easy to come by. The Emperor having emptied His Holy Bucket on us for the last 2 weeks....
Morale isn’t too bad. It’s not allowed to be, the Commissar makes sure of that. The man’s insane, but who comes out of the Schola Progenium not insane..He had Jedins whipped for asking when better food was coming! Now don’t tell him I told you, but if we ever have to go over the top and that fragger is in front of me...well...hey may go MIA...’nade launchers are good at that.
The weapons aren’t doing well though. I’ve had to clean this bastard everyday I’ve sat in this trench. I swear I could have this thing cleaned by a Techpriest and it’d still jam the next day. Got enough ammo so I guess I’m sorta happy. I pity the guys with the lasguns though, there hasn’t been daylight here...well ever. Hate nightworlds. Charging the packs takes a generator and since we ran outta fuel 3 days..days..is that right word? Well 72ish hours ago we haven’t been able to charge anything. Hell all of my laspistol batts were taken by the sergeant!
Oh wait hang on, do you hear that? That’s an alarm, we have incoming! Come on come on...faster faster...right, TAKE THAT YOU...DAMN! Fragging gun...get out you bastard nade...put the next one in..right side down...right! Lets try that again, EAT THIS MOTHER FRAGGERS! WOO! Did you see that? Blew the guy right off his feet and sprayed him over his mates!
Watch it pal, here’s the Commissar.
Might be my lucky day...
